In case you missed our little announcement from Monday, here it is.
Wow! It really does feel so good to have this news out in the open. It’s been hard sitting on this secret for so long–there have been so many moments where I’ve almost accidentally let the cat out of the bag on social media…I think I can thank my pregnancy brain for that. Which has been SO bad this time around. I don’t think pregnancy brain set in for me until I was well into my second trimester the last time around, but I have been a space cadet right off the bat with this one.
There have been a lot of things that have been very different with my second pregnancy vs. my first–a few of them I expected, a few came as a surprise to me.
Morning Sickness: When I was pregnant with Joshua I was hardly sick at all. Occasionally I would feel a little bit queasy, but it was easy to keep in check as long as I ate small, frequent meals. Nausea never kept me down with my first pregnancy. I thought I was one of those lucky ones who just doesn’t get very sick. This time however I have been SO SO sick. It’s been a rough go having to take care of a toddler when the only time I don’t feel like I’m going to vomit is when I’m laying down. Due to that, there has been a lot of Netflix happening for Joshua and for myself. Poor boy. He’s been going a little stir crazy being cooped up at home with momma.
We had a miscarriage scare: With Joshua, I never so much as cramped or spotted a single time. Miscarriage never even crossed my mind with my first pregnancy–partly because at that time I didn’t know how common it was. I didn’t have any friends who had miscarried and no one I knew ever talked about it. I now have a lot of close personal friends who have miscarried recently, so it was definitely heavier on my brain this time around.
This pregnancy, I’ve spotted every so often. Which was so foreign to me, considering I never did with my last pregnancy. It didn’t concern me too much as the spotting was mostly brown–old blood. No cause for alarm. However, last week I had a big scare. While I was siting on the couch, Joshua had climbed up onto the windowsill above our couch and then jumped off and landed full force right on my abdomen. Which hurt. Bad. I didn’t think anything else of it until I used the bathroom right before going to bed that night and discovered my toilet paper was streaked with blood. I tried not to freak out–after all, bleeding without cramping isn’t usually cause for alarm. Then the cramping started. It was late at night, so there wasn’t much I could do except wait for morning when I could make a visit to my doctor’s office. I cried myself to sleep worrying whether or not I was going to still be welcoming a baby into our home in June.
The next morning I visited the doctor’s office so the nurse could use the fetal monitor to check for a heartbeat. She moved the sensor all over my abdomen. 5 minutes passed and she couldn’t find a heartbeat. I was panicking, trying to keep my breathing under control. She told me not to worry too much, that it was pretty common for her to not be able to find a heartbeat with the fetal monitor before 12 weeks. She excused herself to get the portable ultrasound.
And so I waited in silence, totally afraid of what was going to happen next, offering silent prayers to God, pleading with Him that our baby would be okay. The nurse came back with the ultrasound and a tech in tow. They placed the sensor on my belly. I held my breath. And then the most beautiful sight, followed by the most beautiful sound.
Our baby was in there. Heart beating away rapidly. Relief washed over me. I always loved hearing the sound of Joshua’s heartbeat when I was pregnant with him. It was pretty cool. But this time around, that heartbeat meant so much more to me. And even though the experience of bleeding, cramping, and worrying I would lose my baby was super scary and it sucked really bad, I’m glad it happened. It has made me a million times more grateful for this pregnancy and it has given me empathy for other women who have been in that position. In a way, it was really connecting for me to have been in that place.
Wow, that was long. Sorry. Moving on. :)
Fatigue: As I expected, I’m a lot more fatigued this time. When I was pregnant with Joshua I had the luxury of sleeping in and taking naps during the day, but this time I haven’t. I still have to entertain and care for my oldest child, so I just have to assume the role of zombie for a while…
Maternity clothes: I didn’t have to wear maternity pants until I was almost 20 weeks with Joshua. This time however, I started wearing them around 10 weeks. I’m still not showing a whole lot, but my regular pants were way too uncomfortable for me to bother with–plus, they started giving me a muffin top while the panel in maternity pants smooths everything for me . Since I already had a few pairs of maternity pants, I figured, why the heck not? :)
I also feel like I have a much better understanding of what flatters me when I’m pregnant and what my body is like postpartum, so it’s been easier for me to choose clothes that will flatter me now, when my bump is bigger, and once baby is born. I’ve been choosing clothing that I’ll still love to wear even when I’m not sporting a bump. I’m a bit smitten with this open back sweater. :)
So there you go! Those are the differences I’ve noticed so far. I’m excited to share this journey to expanding to a family of 4 with you!
What exciting things are happening in your life right now? :)